Life was too short to be with someone who wasn’t quite right, someone who made you think more than they made you feel.
—Anaïs Escobar (via thelindenbuzz)
—Anaïs Escobar (via thelindenbuzz)
—Alicia Britt Chole
I didn’t expect to wake up this morning and magically life would be different, that the memory and pains of the last six months would disappear. I don’t know what I’m going through right now but I feel as though I’ve just been floating through the last few days and I want that feeling to go away. I might be able to credit it to lack of exercise and the increase in the crap foods I’ve been eating for the last week or maybe I’m just actually really sad. Not sure about what though I’m still working through that part.
As for 2013 I’m ready for a new year and I’m not setting goals for the whole year but I’m going to go month by month. As for January I’ve agreed to complete the following:
Commit to entering all food into myfitnesspal.
No sweet treats.
To new beginnings. Happy New Year.
—Pink, Try (love her)
We had some good times and some bad times but I’m glad to put you into my history book tonight. We started out strong and ended with quite a bang.
January brought the annual Awakening at church a 21 day period of prayer and fasting and it ended with me being baptized with my best friend (when she unexpectedly jumped up onto the stage with me before being dipped under the water). A surprise trip to Savannah, Georgia with my boyfriend at the time. Me and the bestie B reached our one year anniversary of when we started working out regularly. A trip to Virginia to visit Melissa’s sister where we went to New York City for the first time, got a tour of the West Wing, saw Georgetown and ate cupcakes. I turned 30, ended a three and a half year relationship, co-lead a small group at church, moved out of the house I was living in with my ex and moved in with my best friend and her fiancé, helped her find a wedding dress and plan their wedding which is now only four months away, my sister’s bridal shower and bachelorette party, then her cruise wedding and the cruise that followed with my family, I lost my car keys which I didn’t realize until I got back from the trip, paid $200 for a new key to get back to Jacksonville, and as soon as I got back got a phone call from the hotel that they found them, interviewed for a new job and got that job, quit my old job, thought about quitting new job in first week when it became too overwhelming but stuck it out instead, connected with an old high school friend, watched another crappy season of FSU football, went to my first NFL game, visited my family in Naples for the holidays, found out ex boyfriend is with a new girl and introduced girl to his best friend (my bestie’s fiance) saw old friend from high school, made a mistake or two while I was home, started feeling something for old high school friend who told me he didn’t want a relationship right now, got in a bad accident on my way back up from Naples and had to tell said old high school friend I couldn’t be in contact with him anymore because letting my feelings get involved is only going to complicate matters and my heart just can’t take it right now….he never responded.
But tonight I ring in the New Year with my best friend who has been there for me fully this whole year and I’m thankful for all the wonderful people in my life right now.
Have a safe night and a Happy New Year.
It’s hard to believe that Christmas is already next week. I’m nearly done with all of my shopping, hopefully I’ll be wrapping it up tomorrow night. This holiday I will be at home with my family in warm, tropical south Florida. I plan on spending the week at the beach. How ungrateful I was growing up, wishing for snow on Christmas. Ha! After two weeks of rain and gloom the sun finally showed its face. Today it was out all day, but unfortunately I was stuck inside le office. Have a wonderful holiday and enjoy the last couple weeks of 2012.
About a month ago I reconnected with a boy from my past and we’ve been communicating by text ever since. Except I realized that I’m the one always initiating and sending random things. It really is almost embarrassing. I don’t even know why I can’t stop myself. He is attractive but not really, I mean it has been over 10 years since I’ve had feelings for him. I can’t figure out for the life of me why I can’t just stop I can even see myself seeing how lame it is but continuing anyways. I’m thinking it must be out of boredom, because every time I text him it is because I’m in the middle of doing nothing. I already know we’re not going to end up together and I don’t even know if I would want to in the first place even if it were possible. We barely know each other and yet he never asks me anything. He isn’t trying to get to know me and I refuse to move for a guy again unless we are married. I have to just let it go. Next time I’m home if I see him I see him but I have to stop going out of my way. At first I was just trying to be nice and sympathetic a good friend who was trying to be there for someone who if I were going through the same thing it would be unbearable. Lame.
Why wouldn’t you want to believe that you are loved that much? This song I listened to on my way home from work. Moves me to tears almost every time when I think how much I am loved by God, how forgiven I am even though I don’t deserve it. Death can’t have me.
Thanksgiving weekend 2012’s theme song.